Me, My Self, and I

What am I doing today?  Well, part of it will be taken up by going to Panera for an early birthday meal for my boyfriend (happy almost 24th birthday to him) and the rest will be devoted to me and my writing.

I am embracing being selfish and self-involved and all of those horrible “self” words people hurl at you when they think you should be doing something else.

Last week, I had my mid-semester burn out a bit earlier than normal.  Since mid-December, I have been pushing myself to finish The Winter Garden, edit it, and get it ready for publication.  Along with that, I have been working on my university’s newsletter along with the literary magazine and doing my work and readings for class.  I fizzled out and crashed.  Luckily, it wasn’t horrible, but I slept for 12 hours straight, which is really not like me. I laid on the floor with my dogs at 8:00 the night before and only got up once to take them out before I went back to bed and woke up 8:00 the next morning. At that point, I woke up with some clarity. Now that I have a lot of my major projects out of the way or nearly out of the way, I need to take a little time and do something I want to do.

Typically, I’m very serious about my work. All work, all the time, but it doesn’t always make me happy.  Actually, it makes me a little batty after a while, and I am tired of being unpleasant because I’m mildly overwhelmed.  This week, I have decided that since I am slightly ahead of my deadlines, I am going to read The Golem and the Jinni for fun and plan out a bit of book three.  Call me self-centered, but I need this.

Just because I don’t have a traditional full-time job at an office doesn’t mean I’m not working full-time on all of my projects.  For months, I have been going full steam ahead on The Winter Garden, and now that it is ready to go, I am allowed to take a moment to relax.  My family doesn’t really understand how much work I do (apart from my boyfriend) because they assume if I am sitting behind my laptop, I am lollygagging on Facebook. Researching my books or my schoolwork takes hours, and my writing can take just as long.  It can be exhausting, especially when I’m in that whirlwind state between editing and publication.  I love setting a deadline and then killing myself to get there.

Anyway, I’m taking a few personal days. I’m not going to think about school or classwork or professors. I’m going to read The Golem and the Jinni, which I am loving, and do some writing and planning.  If you are feeling burnt out, I hope you can bask in what you love and take a bit of time for yourself.

As a side note, three of my poems were published on Literary Orphans. Check them out here.

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